Tuesday, 30 November 2010

Lazy day and purging

I've done nothing all day, college got cancelled because of the snow and the swimming pool was closed. I've eaten and thrown up twice today. I hate being home, my mum is getting suspicious about my weight again so she made me breakfast and lunch which I then purged. I have to purge dinner as well because I haven't even been for a walk today.
I've done barely any revision :/ I want college to be open tomorrow just so I'm not stuck at home again. Even though I'm going to fail my mock.
I wish purging had no consequences on my teeth. I wish no one could walk in on me. I would just purge everything. But then I'd be bulimic and I don't want to be bulimic. I don't want to be anything really.

TMI warning
All said by a girl who is still in her pajamas at 4:35pm, dirty hair she is scared to brush in case it breaks, and probably BO...eurgh! But I have to save showering for after dinner so I can purge in the shower...I don't actually purge in the shower, I purge in my waste bin in the shower then pour it down the toilet and wash the plastic bin out. Gross I know. I hadn't been purging much but then mum made me food.
Normally when I purge it is just to check my stomach is still empty. Acid and liquid is fine. I worry I might eat without noticing.

1 comment:

  1. Aww eat your food and see tomorrow as another start.
    Dont purge because it hurts your body far far more than Ana, you're better feinging illness and missing your meal altogether.

    So jealous you have snow! It seems to be everywhere in the UK except my town! :(