Sunday, 23 January 2011

Given up? Given in?

I have an exam tomorrow, and if I really sat down now I could pass it, I could get a D maybe a C? I'd still have to retake it in the summer to get a good enough grade for university but I would be performing to the expected level. But I'm not studying...I've been on the computer, my grandparents came over. I've been doing nothing, exactly like yesterday and the day before and the day before that.
I haven't showered in 3 days. My hair is disgusting. I've just given in. I will shower this evening for college tomorrow. I might suddenly start cramming later today, but it is already 3pm...
I still have my cold, but I AM going swimming tomorrow afternoon after my exam. And on Tuesday after family therapy and Thursday before my psych appointment and on Friday after my ultrasound (on my heart).
The homework for family therapy is that we all have to write a good thing about each other person. I honestly don't know what to put...


  1. Awh. I've been doing pretty much nothing as well. I hope your exam goes alright though, and everything else happening this week. And I hope you can think of something to write for Thursday. :/
    I'm sorry you still have your cold, colds suck. :( And thank you for the lovely comments on my blog. :) Take care xxx

  2. Naw maybe it I'd time for you to sit down and deciden what is it you war out of life?! I did this and I am doing more than ever now!!

    ♥ Bree

  3. I'm supposed to be reading 5 chapters of Don Quijote in Spanish. It would probably take 2 days if I started it now, and the reading's due by class tomorrow.

    I hate that feeling that you KNOW you could achieve something, but it's not going to be good enough no matter how hard you try. It is so discouraging, especially on top of being quite addicted to the ADD-inducing Internet. Impossible to do work! Perhaps we need some Adderall . . . it's also appetite-suppressing! ha.

    I know the not showering thing, too. Sometimes you just feel helpless, like even showering isn't worth it, because even that takes to much work. In a word, it's depression.

    Before you can fix your depression, you probably need to find out what's causing it. If it's nothing particular in your life, then it's a chemical problem and you may need meds. (I know I did; I now take Lexapro for both depression and anxiety, and it helps a LOT, even though I am not one who likes to take meds.)

    Overall, it sounds like you are floating along on some very choppy waters. I applaud you for keeping your head up, even when you might want to sink.