Saturday, 5 February 2011

to eat, manger, essen, comer, eten, edere

I just want to eat and eat and eat and EAT. I've already had four biscuits (280) and a kitkat (107) but I want more and more and more and I want my family to go out, go away, so I can eat and eat and eat some more. Even though I want to lose weight, even though I hate how the food feels in my mouth, even though I haven't purged this year. I want twiglets, cinnamon grahams, chocolate, cheese, milk, ice cream. I would have to walk the five minutes to the shop to get those things though, I need to buy phone credit too however I'm too scared to walk round the corner and through the underpass. Not because there is anything to be scared of. Just because whilst I can travel hundreds of miles across the country I find walking around the corner terrifying. For no reason.

Once my parents go out I can have a salad without them moaning "that isn't proper food" and I'll watch Black Swan which my brother's (half american) girlfriend sent him. And hopefully the cravings will subside and I can maybe still stay under 500 calories?

I'm kind of ignoring the Honest Scrap Award at the moment...sorry. I'll do it if anyone thinks it is rude not to. I don't have a desk or a handbag, I don't have a secret box, and I don't have that many secrets that you haven't already been honoured with.


  1. Enjoy Black Swan :] I might be seeing it this weekend.
    I don't think anyone will mind too much about the Honest Scrap, just link them to your original facts? :]
    And I just noticed you have 100 followers exactly now ;]
    Take care xxx

  2. *next weekend!!
    I wish you could edit comments. :[
    I hope the rest of your day goes alright xx

  3. Only do it if you want to :) It's completely your choice. And be strong, you already are with your thoughts of avoiding more food. And you're strong for not purging this year <3 so strong :)

  4. Hope you can resist the bingy feelings. <3 Black Swan should help! Every time I see an ad for that, I never want to eat again...

    Hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend. xoxo

  5. just to let you know, I'm reading.
    take care, xx.

    I think I'm the only person who didn't enjoy Black Swan, as much. I think PT ruined it for me. -.- lol