Thursday, 26 May 2011

Thank you for all your lovely comments, I really mean that.

I've had coffee so far this morning, my exam is at 2pm and I'll have so fruit and soup or something like that beforehand. I'm meeting my friend at college at 12 and then another friend for a coffee just before the exam. I haven't done any revision yet this morning, I'm just trying to stay calm. To be honest it isn't this exam that is stressing me out it is that I have 4 more that I actually do find hard and don't know how I'm going to fit the revision in. I'm trying to just focus on today though.

I'm going to go swimming after my exam, to calm down and also to avoid doing any silly things...and to try and cancel out the feelings and bloating of yesterday. I've gained a kilo (2.2lbs) from it but I know that most of that must be the actual food and liquid not fat. The shorts I wore yesterday are super tight today I'm wearing this baggy grey shirt dress from H&M.

I need to go out in half an hour. I need to find my calculator :S my room is always a tip. I tidy it about once a fortnight and it stays tidy until I do laundry that I don't put away or just take any clothes off...or just until I actually live in it basically. My room at uni (wherever I end up) will be smaller, probably half the size or less especially the Nottingham room which is a bed a sink and a strip of space about 50cm wide. So I'll have to be tidier! I'll have less of my stuff at uni though, it will be simple and organised. My rooms in hospitals have always been "too tidy". My first hospital I had this absolutely huge room, it used to be the school room so it was so big *goes to find photos*

This is the tree I helped paint on the wall, I used to sit under it all the time and they'd moan at me for sitting on the floor...

The wonderful timetable :P it was a ward for teenagers but not everyone had ED's so all the post dinner supervision etc isn't on there. Also I've just noticed that the bedtime for all the different ages isn't on there! I had to go to bed at 9:30 because I was under 15 (I left the day before I was 15!)
This is the thing we all signed when we left, it got put up whilst I was there so they are all people I know...and if you know my first name then you'll be able to spot it :)
This is my bed, it doesn't really show the size of the room. This was when I was packing to leave!
This is another view of my room over in the right hand corner of this picture is a door to the bathroom, you know it is great having en ensuite...except if you have an ED they lock the door so you can't use it without permission! Not to mention I was locked out of my room 12 hours a day so I couldn't do exercise or OCD rituals...

This was my first hospital, they sent me places and then those places sent me back and then in the end it was decided I'd just go home as I needed to have "another crisis" before I'd respond to therapy.

I can't believe it was four years ago that I was there. It was a much nicer building than my other hospitals but the staff weren't that great...the wonders of Chelmsford Priory! (The NHS paid for my by the way, I'm not a millionaire!)


  1. Wow... I always get stuck with roommates when I go to the hospital. You had a great room!

    Hang in there with the exams, I know that's stressful!

  2. First of all, my blogger is not working too well so I can't see much, but I can see this post, soo...

    I'm glad you're trying to avoid doing silly things. I hope you are ok, though I am guessing not. You can talk to me anytime, msn or mail or whatever.

    I'm the same with mess.. :/

    I can see why you'd wanna sit under that tree, it does look lovely and since you helped paint it it must feel a bit homely.

    aww that room looks quite nice & spacious.
    Ikea bag!!

    I hope you feel better soon.
    I hope you manage to get your mind off things.