Monday, 14 November 2011


I spent all of last week feeling horribly desperate, purging food and liquid, cutting, not knowing what to do.
Today I had a waffle for breakfast as there weren't any bran flakes (A WAFFLE!). I've had two cups of coffee. And yes it is gone 3pm and I'm not going to pretend it is normal not to have eaten anything else but I am FULL.
I feel guilty, but it wasn't bad enough to make me purge...or not eat it. It feels odd after only a week of feeling like my heart was going to explode out of my chest to feel reletively well.

I feel bad feeling 'well', I don't like this full sturdy feeling. I feel thinner if I'm dizzy and cold. Evn if I'm exactly the same size.

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