I cleared out over four bin liners of old clothes from my room today. I'm sort of realising that aged almost 20 the clothes I throw away from age 12, 13 should be far too small but I'm throwing them out because they are far to big. I sort of know that isn't right but at the same time I'm pleased because I never want to be like that again, I felt so uncomfortable and awkward and I know that is common in puberty but I just can't stand the idea of ever being like that again.
Then I went downstairs and my H&M sale parcel had arrived with my age 12-14 cardigan and age 13-14 jeans. I don't know. I feel like because I'm still the same height, 164cm which is what the age 13-14 are that I should still fit in them. Plus they were really cheap and I really quite like them and they don't fall down or dig in.
But I know it isn't really normal. I felt like it was okay up til I was say 16/17 then I realised it was a bit odd but now I think I buy more kids clothes than I used to. Before it was that it was really similar to the adults top/jeans/skirt but cheaper. Now I hate the idea of the kids sizes being too small.
I didn't throw away the skirt I wore to my friend's 11th birthday party.
But I can now actually see my bedroom floor, well most of it, there is a massive pile in one corner of all my sewing stuff, old school books etc.
Today I ate porridge (130), 3x coffee (60), 2x breadsticks (40), lettuce & cucumber (15), a biscuit (85), rice noodles (162), peas (60), egg (70), prawns (60). =682 and I'll have a hot chocolate (90) later (772)
I feel like that is an okay/ a lot to eat as in I don't feel like that is too little but if someone else was eating that amount I'd be worried about them whether they were 30kg or 100kg. It is so confusing.