Friday, 10 May 2013

People move on and I just feel like I'm in the same place with my ED that I have been for years. This blog is so repeatitive. 
I've been ill (with a stomach bug) for a week. Two weeks ago I was starting to be more relaxed about food, I wanted to start exercising more but things were going in the right direction. Now I've been ill for a week and barely eaten I'm stuck again, scared to increase my food, scared of people seeing me eat/ not eat. Being sick all the time makes me wonder how I used to do it to myself. I've realised how much weaker my body is and that a nasty bug that someone else here is better from has really knocked me.

I don't know what to do. I sort of want to start a new blog, more focused on steps to getting better. Equally I should probably spend less time on the internet because I've realised how I used tumblr and youtube to trigger myself.

In terms of The Woods, they think I'm not trying enough and that I'm self-pitying. My therapist disagrees and I think my GP does too, communication has broken down, hopefully having a meeting with me, my therapist and T &F.

1 comment:

  1. I end up deleting my posts, every now and then, because its the same moaning and crying every damn time. But this is our life. We can't change it. Our lives are consumed by eating disorders.

    If you feel like starting a new blog, trying to get better, I'll be there for you. If you would send me a link to your blog then, it would be nice.

    Good luck!